How do I survive men telling me I’m not good enough?

As much as I wish it wasn't true, we currently live in a man's world. The twenty-first century is still dominated by unequal gender pay, catcalling as the norm, and women in general experiencing a lack of equal respect in the presence of men.

Picture this: you've been led on for months by a man you have been dating. 

It ends because he's just not ready for a relationship, and then you see on Instagram or hear through the grapevine that he has a new girlfriend a month later. You're left to think ‘Why not me? Why wasn't I good enough?’ This is an experience I'm sure many of us can relate to.

Well, firstly I can tell you - if you ever hear the words ‘I don't want or I'm not ready for a relationship’, run for the hills (unless that's the same thing you are looking for) because ultimately, a person meant for you will not want to have the potential to lose you. Secondly, it should be the complete reversal of it's not you, it's me - because if that person can't see how extraordinary and great you are, go let them be with someone else. The moment you can accept a romantic rejection, I think we will all realise it is so much easier to do than to accept a rejection from a man in the emergence of the working and professional world. 

As this term draws to a close, I am starting to realise that I do not have that much of my degree left and real adult life is looming. In my head I am still a teenager; a teenager in their twenties at that.

One of my most dominant anxieties surrounding this, with the ever-competitive London job market or just the job market in general, is "will I even get a graduate job?" As much as I like my part-time job, I do not want to stay there forever and have high ambitions and expectations for myself. 

This anxiety reaches my main question of "How do I survive men telling me I'm not good enough?" The percentage of female CEOs existing in this country is far and few from the percentage of male ones. It's hard not to imagine that my impending graduate job rejections will most likely be coming from a man.

Moreover, in my university career, I have already felt diminished and degraded by comments from my male peers such as, "an English degree? What can you even do with that?" or remarks like "So you just read books all day", making it sound like my degree is lesser than their degree (probably in Economics).

It is difficult not to perceive comments like these as blind misogyny. I often hear stories during weekly coffee-catch-ups with friends who tell me of similar experiences. I can't imagine that in my lifetime, there will be a time where my intelligence as a female will not be undermined by a man.